Hello Blogger, It's Me Danielle

Wow.  It has been a hell of a long time since I've visited this blog.  So long, in fact, that google apparently now owns blogger and I had trouble logging in.  Truth be told I had no intention of posting this today, but I happened to literally stumble across my blog this afternoon.  I spent 5 hours reading every post I made.  I guess I didn't realize how dedicated I was to blogging back then.

Four years have passed since my last blog post and while re-reading I found a comment someone (Jess) had made in 2010 asking how I've been and basically what I'd been up to since abandoning my blog.  So, I thought I'd fill you in!

My last post was in 2009 when I was just a baby 20 year-old.  I believe where I left off was that I was done with Ex-Boy and I had met my dream guy.  Wow!  What a way to end a blog.

Well, let me first start by saying Dream Boy turned out not to be dream boy, although for a while there I really thought he was.  I left to travel various parts of the world in 2009 and I was still dating Dream Boy.  My first leg of the trip, DC, ended up proving that we just weren't meant to date and we stopped seeing each other.  I spent the rest of the summer having TONS of fun in Israel and then London and then LA before heading back to good old MSU.  I even had a secret affair with a Teaching Assistant during my study abroad!

I should probably also let you know that Ex-Boy and I never dated again.  In fact, we hardly ever spoke again.  I'm not going to lie, I was kind of an asshole when I ended it and I broke up with him for good in a text message.  He wasn't too happy about it, but what goes around comes around.  He ended up getting back together with his ex (the girl he cheating on me with) and stayed with her until, wait for it... just a couple of weeks ago!  That's right, they dated for 4 years!  I found out a couple of days ago that they broke up- she kept the dog they bought together.

As for the rest of the characters I wrote about, here's a breakdown:

Mom: She's still as nutty as always!  Penny ended up moving with her and my Dad to California.  They're both total socal babes now!

Dad:  He's improved his array of jokes thanks to the comedy channel on sirius XM.  He didn't like LA much so him, mom, and penny moved to Irvine, CA.  They are loving it.

BPhil:  My brother ended up moving to California as well and has a cushy job at a big time movie studio and is on the brink of engagement with his girlfriend whom I adore.

Penny: She's such a babe of a dog.  She still looks and acts just like a puppy.  The cutest!

BJ-M:  After my trip to London I ran against BJ-M in elections for Film Club president.  I beat him and our friendship never really was the same.  We didn't see each other very often after that and my senior year he moved back to his hometown.  I hear from friends that he's well.

FA:  I can't believe I liked this guy.  He doesn't like music...wtf!  He's also an aspiring actor and looking back I think I liked his abs WAY more than I liked him.  I think he's still in East Lansing.

The Let Down:  Believe it or not, after I graduated from MSU I moved to the cottage my parents bought close to my hometown.  I ended up hanging out withe LD a couple of times.  The last time we ended up making out ( I always was a suck for a good make-out session).  I realized immediately after that I was no longer the 17 year-old that met him and decided that it was a bad idea.  I recently chatted with him and asked him if we could be friends and nothing else.  He got really big into the Detroit music scene so he's pretty busy but agreed to our friendship.

Neighbor Boy:  Never saw him again after I moved.

NNBoy:  Never saw him again after I moved either.  Although at the end of that semester I did find out that he had been accused of sexually assaulting a girl back in his hometown.  Not sure if it was true or not, but I blocked him out of my life anyways.  He was a player and he was bad news.

Summer Fling:  I'm pretty sure Summer Fling is married now, although I'm not sure if it's to that girl that moved to MI for him or not.  He's definitely in the military.  I'm glad I never went back down that road.  Military life wouldn't have been for me.

And I bet you're wondering what happened to me!

Well, the final two years of undergrad were crazy.  I had a lot of fun, I had a lot more heartbreak from new and different boys, and I really learned about myself.  After graduation I was offered a job working on a movie in Detroit so I packed up and moved to my parents cottage for that summer.  When the job wrapped in July I moved to Los Angeles and have lived there ever since.  I've worked for a production company, as a personal assistant to a TV actress, and on the behind the scene features for The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.

In the beginning of September of 2012 I began dating the real man of my dreams.  On March 27th, 2009 I wrote a blog post titled "Adventures of a Thursday Night".  In that post I mention a Shy Guy- a cute guy I met at a B-Movie Beatdown.  Turns out he was the man of my dreams.  We had run into each other all throughout undergrad and we always exchanged pleasantries.  He had just started dating a girl when I met him in 2009 and he dated her right up until I moved away to Los Angeles.  Every time I ran into him during school I always thought he was flirting with me a little but I new he had a girlfriend so I blew it off.  When I moved we started to chat on facebook every now and then.  And facebook led to texting.  I was beginning to really like him but thought it was crazy considering I lived 2,222 miles away from him.  In September 2012, while I was visiting Michigan for wedding season, we finally went on our first date.  The date lasted the whole day and went into the next morning.  I ended up spending my whole vacation with him (I even ended up staying at his place the whole time) and at the end of it we decided not to see other people- we were head over heels.

Shy Guy and I have been doing the long distance thing ever since.  We have flown out to each others homes every 2 months and have spent every holiday together.  In 10 days I'm actually moving back to Michigan to live in the cottage again and give our relationship a real "In Person" shot.  I plan on working for a year to save and in 2014 I have every intention of starting grad school and if all goes well it will be at MSU.  I plan on going all the way- getting my Masters, my PhD, and then hopefully getting a job as a professor of Film Studies.

That's pretty much everything!  I hope you all have been well.  So much has changed for me over the past 4 years and I'm sure so much has changed for you as well!

I must admit that re-reading all my posts today made me both happy and sad.  I wrote about so much heartbreak and only now do I realize how much fun I really did have in college.  I'm glad I could share that with you all.

Danielle

Dream Boy

Ex-Boy and I are done.

Dream Boy- he is amazing.  This is the boy I hung out with that I mentioned in my last post.

He has every trait I want in a guy that I would be with forever.  He's absolutely perfect for me.  I haven't been as happy as I am today in a really long time.

I don't only have butterflies in my stomach from this boy but rather dinosaurs.  I now know what first-kiss-fireworks feel like.  And I love it.

What has been going down.

Let me just tell you that way too many things have happened for me to account for them all.

I'll start by saying , Ex-Boy is no longer an ex...  I don't even know what we should call him anymore because I never saw this coming.

After a little scare we had (yes, we had a total 'Knocked Up' moment, but we took all the precautions necessary after), we talked about EVERYTHING for about two hours.  He then asked me to be his girlfriend... again.

It would sound like a fairy tale ending for EB, except for the fact that literally the next night I met the man of my DREAMS and he actually was interested in me.

Don't worry I didn't do anything skiezy like Ex-Boy did, but I did hang out with him.  I mean, if Ex-Boy can chill with his ex (the one he cheated on me with) than I can hang out with another boy.

Really I don't know what to think about the whole situation and I'm starting to think I made the wrong decision by saying yes to him.

And so it Happens Again

That's right.  Ex-Boy did it again.

For two weeks I was so twitterpated with him.  Everything was going perfect.  He'd text me every morning and we'd hang out every other night.  He would say the cutest things to me (at least for him it was cute).  I brought him around my friends he didn't know and he got along with them well.

It was great...until he started to distance himself.

The night of my birthday I was really sad.  I just needed to  be held, so even though he forgot my birthday and I really was not happy with him, I went over to his place and we cuddled.

The next morning however, he was back to his old self.  We just cuddled silently and then I left.  It wasn't how it had been the past two weeks where it was fun and cute and flirty- it was sullen and quiet.

He didn't respond to any of my messages for a couple days.  When he finally did text me back they were one word answers.

I haven't seen him since Thursday or Friday when I just showed up at his place and dropped the helmet off.

He texted me today because my name was in the newspaper but it was nothing of substance.

As I predicted- he didn't just hurt me this time, he broke me.

I haven't been the same for the past week, I just mope around.  I can't get it off my mind and at any given moment there are tears welled up in my eyes, just waiting for the right moment to pour out.

I fell for his shit again because I didn't want to (and don't want to) learn from this- I'd rather live in the vicious cycle of it all where I don't have to admit to being alone.

Truth is...

I'm destined to be alone.

the real B-Day post.

Last night I did NOT sleep well.  That whole milk and cookies before you go to bed isn't always a good idea.

So today is my B-day and I angrily mentioned before.  It had a bad beginning but I decided to make the best of the rest of it.

Last night before my freak out was great!  I spent the last hours of my old age bumming around with K-Girl.

We then brought in my birthday with Grey's Anatomy, awesome cookies, milk, and cigarettes- all of my vices.

We also did the obligatory boy talk which, with this whole ex-boy thing, is always needed.

He's been so sweet lately, yet today, my special day, he has yet to even say hi.  Unlike when we were dating and he ignored Valentines day and I let it slide, this time he isn't getting off so easy.  If he really doesn't care to wish me a happy birthday, I am going to flip out on him, and lay ALL of his shit out there.

I'm done walking on egg shells with this one, trying not to mess anything up in hopes of it working out.  Sometimes, people need to be told when they are being complete assholes.

And of course I could be completely over reacting since he does still have 10 and a half hours to redeem himself- but we will see if he does.

It's strange being another year older.

Bothersome a little.  I'm not going to lie, this morning when I sat and literally just BAWLED about my car breaking down today and how I wasn't going to make it to my hair appointment, there was more that I was crying about.

Sometimes growing up is really difficult.  What really comes to mind is the fact that my family is moving.  It's like all of the sudden I'm a year older, I'm losing my home so my parents can go yup it up in LA, and it's scary!

Another thing more about the birthday thing is that my B-days are never that exciting.  I never have a completely special fantastic day, and the reason I freaked so much this morning (if only you could have seen it, it was ridiculous) was because to me going out and getting my hair done was the only thing that I could control and make special for myself.  I don't know that having dinner with Mom will be so enjoyable, or that film club will be fun tonight, or if my friends will want to celebrate with me after, but I do know that I can go and pamper myself and make it a good day- and when my car broke, it ruined it!  Well its working okay (for now) so I'm going to go have a good day!

W00hoo!

No Good Very Bad B-Day

It is my Birthday.  And my car decided to die.

Seriously- this is just my luck.  Great start to the day, huh?  So EB gets in her car after bringing in the first B-Day hour with K-girl watching grey's, and drives home.  Then, it dies.  In the parking lot.

I wish I could sleep through the rest of the day and forget about the fact that me and my car are getting old and on our way to death.

Epiphany...finally!!!!

Okay it may just be that I've been awake way too long, considering it is nearly 7 AM and I've yet to get to bed (curse you awful job), or it could be an actual epiphany.  I'm thinking it's the latter, if not the awesome playlist I have going that's helping me stay awake mixed with Redbull.  I digress.

I think I like, maybe even love the place I am at with Ex-Boy right now.  Please don't think I'm saying I love him, because that would be pushing it WAYYY too far.  No. I love the place I'm at with him.

It's like playing house without any titles attached is it's own silent title.  Almost as if not having that BF/GF label makes us our own thing.

I'm not about to stop flirting with whatever comes along, but I'm pretty sure I won't be hooking up with anyone else.  And by the way he's acting, I think the same goes for him.

For example:  This may get a little risque, and I'll allow it, only because of my lack of sleep.  He was in the process of removing my bra, which he happened to be sucking at.  I said to him, "Wow!  Someone has lost their game," in a joking tone of course, and he responds with, "I'm sorry, but the last person who's bra I removed was yours, the other night, and back in September!"

He didn't have to say that- but it's like he's been trying to make this point that I'm the only one he's been with.  I'm sure he's doing this because of the cheating incident, but either way.

I feel like we are on the same page.

My good friend, lets call her Irene, made a GREAT point the other day when we last chatted about the situation, before it got as juicy as it is (another post to come about that).

She pointed out that I will be gone for the whole summer.  I will not only be across both sides of the country at times, but even across the Atlantic, for quite a while.  Ex-boy couldn't even be faithful to me when I was right in front of him, let alone in Europe.

It would be reckless of me to try to be in a real relationship with him now, knowing that I'm leaving in something short of two months.

Yet, I like what we have, and our new little dynamic that has popped up with his alleged change.

So I've decided.  I'm going to keep things exactly as they are.  If he decides a little ways or a long ways down the road that he wants to revert to his old ways, and ditch me again, that's fine, I'll be gone all summer.  If not, then you know what?  He'll just have to wait for the real deal for when I get back.

For once I feel good about this.  I feel like this is me going with my gut and not based on what my heart wishes the happy ending would be or what my skeptical friends all think.

It's that perfect mix of my head and my heart and my stomach working together, feeding me the next step to take.

In this case, there is no step.  I'll stay planted, and enjoy the new found balance.

I'm a trouble maker.

So here is what I am doing.

I am going to take it slow.  And for as long as I can try to suppress the crazy in me that is always wondering if he's going to do it again.

On that note.

I'm twitterpated and it's bad.  If you didn't know, twitterpated is a term from Bambi and it means being simply in deep puppy love.

Ex-Boy started talking about my birthday last night (which is in a week!).  He asked what I wanted, etc. etc.

Ohhhh boy.

A Letter to Ex-Boy

If I could write Ex-Boy a letter, this is what it would be:

Dear Ex-Boy,

We have been at this for a year and a half.  This on and off regime that we seem to be stuck in, like a never ending game of monopoly.  But I am scared.  We would always get together and then it would be as if we didn't even know each other for a couple of months, and alas we would get back together again.

You seemed different the other day.  As if nothing that happened before ever took place, as if you met me for the first time and you just wanted to be with me.  Two days have passed and I find myself in a fearful mindset.

You've messed with my heart so many times before, that even though you seem so sincere this time, I can't help but find myself wondering, is he doing the same thing to me again.

How blind does one have to be to go back to someone that many times.  And even if you have changed, I'm not sure that I can go through each day and moment that we aren't with one another wondering if you are going to change your mind and decide that you're done with me again.

The last couple of times you really did hurt me.  You hurt my feelings, but I'm scared that if I continue with optimism, thinking that you've really changed, and then you change your mind again, it will truly break my heart.

You may have just hurt me before, but I fear that if it happens again, you won't only hurt me, but you will break me.  My being, my spirit, and my heart.

It's only 2:43 PM and I haven't spoken to you yet today.  A normal person shouldn't be afraid that their other doesn't want them anymore just because they haven't had a moment to check in.

It's like the boy who cried wolf, every time we have been together and then the next day you say, just kidding, I just wanted the physical part and then left.  But the one time that it does matter, if it is even that time, I'm not sure that I can have or put enough faith into it to know that you haven't just been busy.

My mind only goes to the thought of you thinking to yourself, "what was I doing, I don't want to be with her again, better stop talking to her."

I don't know what to do.  I fear that either way I will end up hurt.

These feelings have never had a chance to go away.  You've kept me on your fishing hook, even though you haven't had the nerve to reel me in.

Just thought I'd put my fears out there, just in case you wanted to clear that up.

For now, but not always,

EB

The 8 Words That Made my Heart Beat Faster

8 words.  One sentence, or question, rather.  "Does this mean we can watch movies now?"

Ex-Boy asked me this question this morning.  This probably makes no sense to you.  How and why could these 8 words make my heart beat faster?

Lets rewind.

Ex-Boy and I have been talking a lot lately.  It started before my London trip.  We had the first somewhat pseudo-intelligent conversation that we've ever had.  I didn't think too much of it, except for the fact that he asked me to pick him up a certain kind of scarf there in which he'd pay me for.

I get  back and we continue to talk from time to time.  Sometimes I would instant message him, yet a lot of the times he'd instant message me.

One night his roommate who happens to be a friend of mine came to my apartment and we watched Run Lola Run- a great german film.  EB's Roommate went home and told Ex-Boy about it, in which EB started to talk to me more and more about movies.

I liked it, because it was, in his weird and twisted way, him opening up to me.

He started recommending films to me, which I would try to download.  He also said I could just borrow some of them from him.

To be honest, he was being friendly, but not inviting.

The other day he I/Med me though and raved about Techno Tuesday at one of the local bars (which I can get into).  He told me I should go next week, still though, friendly, but not extremely inviting, for a lot of my friends go with him.

Skip to last night.

It is Final Four, and my team, the Spartans have just made it into the national championships.  I'm out and about partying, and it's getting late.  I don't feel like wasting seven bucks, so I give EB's roommate a call, since I'm partying a couple houses down from them.  I ask if I could crash there and he said yes, but the couch was taken.  It's fine though because EB's roomie happens to be gay, which means I get the privilege of sleeping with him in his bed and it not being anything but sleeping.  I accept the invitation and head over there.

I'm in his room when we both hear Ex-Boy arrive home.  I decided oh so coincidentally (I have a problem with giving up on him, okay!) to go get a glass of water.

Ex-Boy seems happy to see me, and we are both drunk.  I go upstairs with him and, well...you know.

We wake up this morning and we are still all cuddly.

NOTE:  I'm weary of this.  This has happened a handful of times since we've been broken up where we would hook up and the next day we would cuddle, almost with a sad tone set to it, and then he wouldn't answer any calls or I/Ms from me  after, until a couple months later in which the same thing would repeat itself, and I still could never completely and fully give up on him.

This time it seemed different.  He wasn't the sad and sullen cuddly guy he usually is the morning after hooking up since we've been broken up.

I even mentioned it to him.  He was more open with me, talking about his family and friends, book, and movies.

We cuddle more, we kiss more, and it's cute.

He then turns to me and says the 8 words.  "Does this mean we can watch movies now?"  He then goes on to say, " I was too much of a pussy to ask you to watch all the movies I recommended you with me."  I reply and tell him the same thing.

He then asks me if I purposefully came about his house or if it was by sheer coincidence and need, and I admit that there might have been some plotting beforehand.

He's glad, he says.

He makes me breakfast and we cuddle more, then he drives me home on his bike.  When I get off of it and I go to hand him my helmet he says "Why don't you hold onto it, oh and don't forget we are watching movies together, and hopefully soon, please get at me soon".

WHAT DO I DO?!!! I  MELTED.

Yes, he cheated before.  Yes, he's a stupid boy.

But this time he really DOES seem different.  This time it's more than just "look at the weather" with him.  He's opening up.

I know, I know.  I need to be careful.

I still am in shock though.

Adventures of a Thursday Night

There's something about the adventures and misadventures of pulling an all-nighter with good friends that is extremely enticing.

Last night had a mist of excitement in the air, even before I had any solid plans.  The night started with a B-roll movie at Replay, a small entertainment exchange in downtown East Lansing.  Basically this event consists as follows:

a.  You hang out with a bunch of hipsters, nerds, and people of all different breeds.

-It's really rather relieving being in an environment with a bunch of people who normally wouldn't fit in the same social circles.

b.  You watch a crappy B-roll movie

-Movies that kind of suck, and are very raw and 'edgy'.

c. You vocally criticize and narrate the film as it plays, commonly making fun of it.

-This also fits into the category of meeting new people because you converse with those around you

Basically, it was a great experience.  I was expecting a bunch of nerdy gamer kids, but there happened to be a lot of really cool people there, not to mention the most adorable 'shy-guy' I've ever met.

***

Once we left Replay, I headed over to BJ-M's, where I met Bethany, one of my tightest girl friends.  We hung out, watched movies, watched Tales From the Crypt, and just had a good, relaxed time.  Around 5 AM Bethany and I decided a McDonald's run was in order on the way home considering that they were now serving breakfast, however BJ-M, being the douche bag we all love and adore, wanted us to pick him some up and drop it off, which was completely out of the way.  After much bickering we decided not to go to MD's.  Then, as if a fluke, on the way home Bethany turns to me and says, "Lets go to McDonald's and just not tell BJ-M".  At that moment Bethany became my new favorite person.

***

We walk into McDonalds.  I was rather loopy do to the time, and Bethany was still a bit intoxicated, and by a bit I mean adorably tipsy.  As we enter we are addressed by some guys who appear to be intoxicated, but we aren't sure.  They greet us and then invite us over for beer pong...at 5 in the morning.   We are then sure.  I politely decline for us, since Bethany had an 8 AM this morning, and they weren't very nice after that.  They left.

We then order, get our food and sit.  Two adorably drunk boys enter and ask us if they could join.  We obliged and chatted.  Not going to lie, I would have loved to hang out with them even though it was ridiculously later... or early.  We  exchanged digits and dropped the boys off at their house.

***

Nights like last make me happy to be young.  I dread the day that I have to go to bed at promptly 10 PM, after reading a book like "How to Battle Being Middle-Aged".

So Cal and More

My parents are moving...

I'm moving?

It's complicated.  My dad is getting relocated from Michigan to LA, California.  I'm going to school still at MSU.  Now though, when I want to go home or to go see my parents or my dog, I have to fly to LA...

It's weird.  I almost feel homeless.  I have my apartment, but I don't have a house.  My parents will have a house in LA- but is it really home to me?  I've never even been to that house.

So I have no home.  My parents have a home.  Not I.

***

In other news, Buffalo Wild Wings is now off of my "safe places to eat" list.  Thanks to their wings I spent the night sleeping on my bathroom floor, extremely unhappy.

Also, film film and more film.  I've missed it these past couple of weeks, but it is now coming back.  I'll be doing a voice over sock puppet skit with my costar from A Little Change in which I'm a Sarah Palin Sock Puppet and he's a Bush sock puppet for a new sketch comedy tv show that Fight Song Films is putting on.  I also just auditioned for a role in a mockumentary, so we'll see what happens with that.

Live long and prosper people.

Quick Update

I have a five page paper to write, a two page paper to write, a bunch of reading to do, and I don't want to do any of it.

School is not fun :(

Haven't really talked to BJ-M since the St. Patty's Day incident.

Ex-Boy and I have been talking a bit which is always weird and raises my hopes, then kills them instantaneously.

Joy.

St. Patty's Day

Let me just say that St. Patrick's Day will always leave a bad taste in my mouth.

Last year it was right after I broke up with Ex-Boy.  I was around annoying drunk people the whole day, stuck really far off campus with no transportation anywhere.  I finally sobered up and played DD to a party my friends were having that night.  By the time we got there everyone had been drinking all day long and were so on edge that it just wasn't any fun- for a lot of people.

Then I looked over and there it was, Ex-Boy, whom I had only been broken up with for two weeks, yet we still hooked up the week before (I had a hard time letting go), making out with a girl that was brought along to the party with one of my friends.

Needless to say I spent the night in tears.

*****

This year wasn't any better.

First off it was a stressful day of classes, which, when they ended I had a gruesome paper to write that I had been putting off for over a month that was due two days prior (I got a couple days extended).

After I finally finished the paper, which normally should have only taken me an hour or two to write, yet took me four hours to finish, I got ready for film club- something fun, right?

Well BJ-M decided that none of them were going to go, and I already agreed to meet an acquaintance there.  So I was stuck, without any of my confidants, attending film club expecting to see the Pres there.  Luckily he was too much of a pussy to show his face.

A good friend, we'll name her K Girl, ended up coming by and we went to BJ-M's place, despite that fact that he pissed me off by not attending last minute.

*****

We walk into a house, which you must imagine, that I know like the back of my hand.  I've basically lived there the past three and a half months.  The guys that live there are my best male friends, and know more than most about me, vice versa.  It's the kind of friendship that I can just show up unannounced and we end up hanging out cooped up there for three hours straight.

We have a solid group of friends that party and hang out with us that we very rarely stray from and if we do it's usually only one or two randoms that show up.

So I walk in and walk downstairs to where there is a plethora of party voices, only to find SEVEN people whom I have absolutely NO idea who they are, and only TWO of my friends.  You must understand that to walk into a situation like that with no prior warning is very uncomfortable.

It turns out that these are people BJ-M  and friends met on spring break in Panama.  One of which, is a girl BJ-M was obviously hooking up with considering the fact that she CLUNG to his arm as if the world was going to end...ALL night.  If that wasn't annoying enough, she was extremely unfriendly when I attempted to talk to her.

The time I spent trying to enjoy myself with K Girl and Jar (another friend), was soiled only by BJ-M coming up to me and whispering in my ear "oh my god you're so poutty, stop pouting!  wow you are so mad at me!  You are so mad!  You're pouting so much!"

*****

Truth is, I was really trying to have fun up until that point- I was singing along with the music, dancing with my friends.  But after he kept doing that- which is what he obviously wanted to see me doing, and after the hooker that was clinging was as unfriendly as she was, I really did start to pout.

I sat there with phone in hand, and played on it for 2 hours.  Once I was finally okay to drive I up and left, barely saying goodbye to anyone.

I turned to the hooker and throw her a quick "nice meeting you," without really even looking at her, and leave.

What probably pissed me off the most was the fact that BJ-M was a completely different person in front of this girl.  He wouldn't even play the music he liked (hardcore) until she left, but when she came back he'd switch it off.  He barely talked to me and Jar because we are the prime people he likes to freak out on, which I'm sure he didn't want to do in front of her, even though we all know he's only joking around, or that's just how he is.

*****

I don't care anymore.  I'll admit it.

I don't have those kind of feelings for BJ-M anymore.  But I definitely am the competitive, jealous best friend.

I don't like change- especially when I see it going in a bad direction.  Anyone who asks you, or you feel you must, change yourself for, isn't worth it.  Who I am is too important, more important than some college hook up or relationship.

I think I need a break from my group of friends now.

My Trip!

Well- London was amazing.  I'm already counting down until summer.

Paris was... an experience.

The second we got off the train we were bombarded by gypsies begging for money.  I didn't feel as safe or comfortable as I did in London.  The hotel we were at was on a shady street, but luckily we found the nicer areas surrounding it.

We stayed in Montparnasse, Paris.  The first night we went to dinner in the area.  I fell in love with every waiter we had there.  They were adorable.  The second day we did a bunch of touristy things.  We started with Musee D'orsay to see a bunch of the famous impressionist paintings.  Then we went to the Eiffel Tower, Arch De Triumph, Champs-Elysees, etc.  We ended the day at Sacre-Coeur, which is a church in Montmarte (the highest point in Paris).  The last day was dedicated to shopping.

Overall Paris was pretty okay, but I still liked London better.

I'd go into more detail about it but we did and saw so much that it would be impossible to cover all of the bases.

I will say that my brother's roommate is the most adorable Jewish English boy I've ever met- plus his family is in the diamond business- can you say catch?!

It was a good time.  I'm not looking forward to getting back into the whole school thing :(

zzzzzzz

Real post to come.  The other side is tiring.

Cultural Differences?

Something really interesting in London.  On the streets, no one really makes eye contact with you.  When they do, it's  very rare and usually they aren't British or from the area.

I'm so used to walking down the streets in the U.S. and locking eyes with hundreds of people everyday.  Even if I don't acknowledge them, I still look at them.

It's just strange to me, that's all.

Day 1

London.

Amazing.

Got on the plane, slept, read, slept some more.  Arrived, ate, slept, ate.

Walked through Angel- lovely.  Saw the canals.

Tonight is dinner with the parents and brother, then pre-gaming in Angel.  Clubs in Camden.

I feel like I'm a  character in The Rules Of Attraction by Bret Easton Ellis.

London and Paris

My spring break has started and it's a good thing, too.  Tomorrow will consist of packing and spending the day going through customs at the airport.

Our flight to London departs at 6 PM and arrives, MI time, at 2 AM, London time that is 8AM.

Good thing I work shitty hours because I won't get jet lag too horribly.

Wednesday and Thursday will be spent in Paris.

We depart London on Saturday to head back to the states.

I. Am. So. Excited!!!!

Agreed

My friend from work had this posted on his facebook.  I read it, and instantly associated it with every guy I've ever dated.

if you "don't mean to be a dick" and then you do something that makes you a dick...not only are you a dick, but you are a liar.